Beyond this Sphere
by RavenDove
Summary: Trip is pulled into an anomaly where he meets his dead sister and must face the fact that after the Xindi attack on Earth she is only his memory.


This story was submitted to and rejected by Strange new worlds just after the end of Enterprise's second season. It was then serialized by the USS Kelly Communique news letter for the USS Kelly Star Trek Fan Club in Salt Lake City, Utah

BEYOND THIS SPHERE

By Ensign Lyda Mae (RavenDove) Dameron

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Captain Jonathan Archer frowned as he looked down at his chief engineer. "Have you come up with a way to shield the warp core against this new kind of subspace static anomaly?" Archer has sought out Commander Charles "Trip" Tucker hoping that he had come up with an answer he hadn't yet had a chance to report to the rest of the senior crew.

Trip pulled his head out of the compartment he had been banging around in and shrugged, running his fingers through his dark blond hair. "T'Pol and I spent eight hours yesterday trying to come up with a different angle to approach it from." He paused, making a face that Archer understood as pure frustration. "The fact is we can't even be sure what the anomaly would do if our warp core passed through one. I could cause a core breach or nothing at all." He stood up and placed his spanner back into the tool kit he'd left sitting on a ledge above the compartment. "It would be easier if we could detect them sooner."

"But they are unstable by nature and can form and collapse so rapidly that one could actually form inside the warp core before we knew it was there." Archer finished. "If we knew a way to predict what parts of the distortion field they might form in we could avoid them entirely."

"But that's not possible either," Trip shook his head as he moved toward the front of the warp reactor casing. "Anomalies within anomalies Cap'n. Welcome to the Delphic Expanse." He said as he leaned forward to examine a control panel. "I'm beginning to understand why the Vulcans and Klingons avoid this place."

Archer looked at Trip with skepticism knowing his Chief Engineer's personal stake in finding the Xindi. "Are you saying we should abandon our mission Commander?"

Anger flashed from Trip's face as he looked back up at Archer. "I never said that Captain."

A bright white vortex of energy passed through the forward bulkhead behind Trip and the forward momentum of the ship caused both Trip and the warp core to pass through the anomaly. Trip faded in and out of view like a damaged view screen finally dying and was gone.

"…so," Archer finished amid the chaos of alarms. He looked down at the control panel that Trip had been working on and typed in the commands to verify whether they were about to become subatomic particles or not.

The warp field had been disrupted for only three point six seconds. He watched as the engines stabilized with minimal help from the on-duty crew. Once the alarms quieted he made his way to a comm. panel. "Archer to bridge."

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Trip was unsure what had happened. He couldn't quite remember where he had been only moments before, but he was sure it wasn't here. He opened his eyes and the world around him came into focus.

He was with Lizzie in an open-air restaurant near the beach. Lizzie sat across the table from him in the shade of an umbrella eating a strawberry-spinach-poppy seed salad. She looked up and asked sweetly, "So how are things on your ship Triple?"

Trip took in the sight of his little sister, her long blond hair, her tanned skin, her smile. She was like something out of a dream and there was something eerie about the scene, but he couldn't place what. It didn't seem right that he was here with her, and yet here they were together. He had missed her so much, and yet it was like he had never left her behind to…. to what? He knew there was something he should remember, but he couldn't quite wrap his mind around it.

"Hello…. Trip," she waved her hand in front of his eyes. "I asked you a question."

"Hmm, " Trip said, finally forcing his mind to come into sync with the moment. "I'm sorry Lizzie. I think I was somewhere else."

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"All stop Mr. Mayweather," T'Pol called out as she headed for the science station.

"Aye, sir," Ensign Mayweather responded.

Before Travis could finish reacting she was studying the readings of the anomaly the ship had just passed through, and though the warp engines had apparently survived the experience, it was no doubt unsettling to the crew.

"Engines answering all stop Sub-Commander," Travis said as the Enterprise's forward momentum died.

"Should we go to tactical alert Sub-Commander?" Lieutenant Malcolm Reed asked."

"Negative Mr. Reed," T'Pol responded. Her finger was on the button to call the Captain, when his voice came over the comm.

"Archer to bridge."

"T'Pol here Captain. I have ordered all stop. The ship just passed through a subspace static anomaly that is now directly aft of us. We appear to have suffered no damage."

"Not from where I'm standing Sub-Commander."

T'Pol could practically hear her commanding officer clenching his jaw. "Please specify Captain."

"The anomaly passed through Commander Tucker and now he is missing."

"I'll run a full scan for his bio sign Captain." It took only seconds for the scan cycle to complete. "Commander Tucker is not aboard the Enterprise Captain." T'Pol looked up from her instruments, "All other crew members appear to be accounted for, including our recent additions," she said, referring to the marines they had taken on during refit back on Earth.

"That's good to know T'Pol, but that doesn't explain what happened to Commander Tucker."

T'Pol looked down at her station. "Perhaps a more detailed analysis of the anomaly will provide answers." Her fingers played gently over the controls, and one eyebrow rose.

"Captain I'm picking up two fluctuating life signs inside the anomaly. One appears to be human. The other is less stable, and is of no species on record."

"Is it possible the human is Commander Tucker?" Archer asked.

"Unknown Captain; but a likely hypothesis." T'Pol reset the controls for another scan.

"If it is, at least he has company." Archer said with a touch of irony.

"Let us hope that company is friendly Captain," said T'Pol. "From the anomaly size and rate of decay I would estimate it has been here for at least several days."

"If it didn't just form, why didn't we detect it in time to avoid it?" Archer asked.

"The anomaly has an unusual resonance frequency that we have not encountered before, which masked it from our sensors until it crossed paths with our warp core."

"At it's current rate of decay, how long do you estimate we have until it collapses?"

"T'Pol looked up from her station again. "There are fluctuations within the anomaly that will make its collapse harder to predict, but it is inevitable that it will eventually collapse."

"Do the best you can. Archer out."

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"Where exactly were you Triple?" Lizzie asked her big brother as she demurely wiped dressing from her lip with a mauve napkin.

Trip smiled sheepishly, "At least a million miles away."

Lizzie had a slightly hurt expression as she picked her fork back up. "Care to tell me about it?"

Trip thought hard for a moment and frowned. "I'm not sure I can." The more Trip thought about it, the less it seemed to matter. "I'm sorry Lizzie," he said apologetically. "I guess it wasn't that important."

Lizzie looked back up at her brother with a renewed twinkle in her eye. "I was asking you about how things are going on your ship."

Trip looked down at his white and brown Hawaiian shirt, then back up at Lizzie. "I don't want to talk about the _Enterprise_, Lizzie," Trip said shaking his head. "I'd rather talk about you."

"There's not much to talk about, Charles," Lizzie said gesturing with her free hand. "I don't visit exciting new worlds, or make contact with exotic races." She looked back at her salad. "I draw buildings."

Trip laughed lightly. "You make so little of your accomplishments, Lizzie." He smiled. "You're more modest than I remember."

The conversation turned to things of the past, and childish memories. The more they talked the more the world around them faded so that all that remained around Trip was Lizzie and the table. The things around them didn't matter; all that mattered to him was that she was there. Wrapped up in the moment he didn't miss the squawk of the seagulls, the laugh of children playing on the nearby beach, or the light buzz of the other restaurant patrons talking.

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The _Enterprise's_ senior staff, minus Commander Tucker, stood around the table in the situation room with a graphic of the anomaly displayed across its surface. Its constant swirling energy was almost hypnotic in nature.

"The anomaly appears to be stable for the moment, but I believe it will collapse within the next eighteen hours," T'Pol said.

Lieutenant Reed frowned, "That means we have less than eighteen hours to retrieve Commander Tucker."

Archer mirrored Malcolm's frown as he moved back from the table and laid his arms across his chest. "Exactly." He turned away from the others and half began to pace. "I suppose just sending a shuttle into the anomaly to try and retrieve him and the unknown occupant of the anomaly would be a waste of time."

"That is correct, Captain," T'Pol continued. "The bio-signs exist in a state of matter energy flux being both and neither at the same time."

"The transporter," Ensign Hoshi Sato said with a queasy feeling in the pit of her stomach.

"A logical deduction, Ensign," said T'Pol. "However, it will take some time to realign the targeting scanners to compensate for the fluctuations inside the anomaly and the pattern buffers may still have trouble recognizing a coherent form."

Lieutenant Reed shook his head. "If only Commander Tucker were here instead of in there: then I'd have a better estimate of our chances in succeeding."

"If Commander Tucker were here, Lieutenant, we wouldn't need to retrieve him," said T'Pol.

Malcolm tilted his head and looked straight at T'Pol with an expression that Trip had once described as scolding a lemon for being sour. "I'm aware of that, Sub-Commander."

Archer stopped pacing and turned to face T'Pol. "I believe Mr. Reed was expressing a wish for Commander Tucker's expertise at the moment. " He looked over at Malcolm. "A sentiment I share, Mr. Reed. But sentiments won't get Trip out of that anomaly."

Archer surveyed the faces of his crew and readied his orders in his mind. "Mr. Mayweather, get back to your station and turn us to face the anomaly."

"Aye, aye, Sir." Travis shook his head in acknowledgment and left the room. Archer turned to Lieutenant Reed. "Malcolm, you'll help T'Pol with the targeting scanners."

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Trip and Lizzie laughed hardily over shared memories, and were nearly in tears when a waiter set a plate in front of Trip. Trip looked up half startled by the waiter, and the world around them came back into being.

The waiter was an unassuming Native American with a deep knowledge in his eyes. Trip read his name tag. _Lakanta; what an odd name_. There was something strangely comforting and unsettling about him at the same time. What Trip did not know that Lakanta was the only real thing here, beside himself.

Lakanta's brow furrowed, "You did order pan fried catfish, sir."

Trip looked at his plate. "It would appear I did."

The waiter set a plate of shrimp and vegetables in front of Lizzie and walked away.

"So," Lizzie said, "are you going to tell me about your ship or not?"

Trip sighed, "Where should I start?"

"Start with where you left off in your last letter."

Trip thought for a moment and then began to tell his sister about the last planets they had visited before being recalled to Earth. Then continued with the antics of his crew mates. He told Lizzie enthusiastically of Travis' latest practical jokes, Dr. Pholx's odd cultural observations, and Sub-Commander T'Pol's unusual interpretations of the most recent movies that had been screened by the crew. He told her everything and the world around them faded again.

The closer he got to the present, the more anxious he got. "…And then we were recalled to Earth."

"Why were you recalled to Earth?" Lizzie asked with a troubled expression.

Trip thought hard. "I can't remember." He shook his head and grew more agitated. "Why can't I remember?"

Lakanta appeared at the side of the table. "You can't remember because part of you doesn't want to." Trip looked up at him; this time the world around them did not return, and Trip noticed what was missing for the first time.

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Malcolm felt a shock as two wires that were not supposed to cross did, and he pulled his burnt fingers from inside the access panel. He bit his lip; determined not to complain. "I hope this works."

"It will Lieutenant." T'Pol reassured him from the control station. "I am ready to reinitialize the targeting scanners."

Malcolm closed the access panel and stood up.

"T'Pol to bridge," she said as she ran through the final calibrations. "We're ready to make our attempt."

Archer's voice responded, "Acknowledged Sub-Commander."

"Attempting to establish transporter lock." T'Pol said calmly as she activated the scanners. "Initiating transporter sequence."

Two humanoid shapes began to take form on the transporter pad, one was all gray and one that was pink and dark blue. They flickered briefly and then disappeared. There was an audible pop and smoke began to pour from the edges of the access panel Malcolm had just replaced. The attempt had failed.

"What happened?" Archer asked.

"One of the primary circuit relays has failed Captain," T'Pol responded. "It will take time to replace it."

There was urgency in Archer's voice as he answered, "You'd better hurry T'Pol. The anomaly has begun to destabilize more rapidly."

"Understood Captain," said T'Pol. "T'Pol out."

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Trip look at what was around him in astonishment. All of it had faded away except Lizzie, the table, and Lakanta. He stood up to face Lakanta and asked, "Who are you?"

"This is your reality my friend," he said. "I am only what you let me be."

"That doesn't make any sense," Trip said accusingly.

Lizzie and the table then disappeared so that only Trip and Lakanta remained. "We are in a place beyond the sphere of existence that you understand Trip. We are in a realm ruled by the powers of the mind, and your mind alone is in control."

"If I'm in control, why can't I remember?" Trip shouted.

"Because a part of you doesn't want to," Lakanta replied in a calm, even tone.

"Why wouldn't I want to remember?" Trip said, on the verge of tears.

"Because it hurts."

In those three words Trip collapsed. He saw the restaurant and Lizzie and himself in a nightmare. The same nightmare he had had nearly every night since he learned of Lizzie's death. First as the child he once was, and then as the man he had become, he shouted. He shouted to a Lizzie that could not hear him. Shouted for her to get out of the way of an attack from the sky that would scorch Earth and leave nothing behind—not even Trip's little sister.

He wanted to make every Xindi pay for this unthinkable thing they had done. He would never speak to Lizzie again; never tease her, or hear her laughter. The Lizzie he had been talking to was a ghost, a figment of his wishful imagination; and that made it hurt even more.

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Trip and Lakanta were surrounded by the effect of the transporter. Trip looked up at that instant and saw, for only a moment, the form of a gray-skinned, but kind-looking alien. He could tell that this stranger felt, and shared his pain. That was of little comfort.

"We have recovered Mr. Tucker and the unknown alien from the anomaly, "said T'Pol, once the two forms finished materializing.

"Are they alright T'Pol?" asked Archer over the comm.?

"They appear to be Captain," responded T'Pol, "if somewhat disoriented."

"Are you there Trip?" Archer called.

It took Trip a moment. "I'm here Cap'n, but can somebody please tell me where I've been?"

"You were pulled into a sub-space anomaly Commander," Malcolm answered as he helped Trip form the transporter pad. "What should we do about him Commander?" Reed asked, pointing to Lakanta.

"He's a friend," Trip said evenly.

Archer came back over the comm. "You might want to get back up here Sub-Commander. It looks like the anomaly is about to collapse, and it's going to be an interesting show.

"Acknowledged Captain," she answered as she left the control station and headed for the bridge, with Trip and Lakanta eagerly following.

Archer watched in fascination as the energy vortex on the main screen changed from solid white to a rainbow flickering in and out of the visual spectrum. The turbolift opened admitting T'Pol and the others. T'Pol took her place at the science station and began to monitor the anomaly, while Malcolm and Trip likewise took their stations. Lakanta remained near the turbolift silently watching.

Once the anomaly had faded from view entirely Archer turned to T'Pol. "Did you get all that Sub-Commander?"

"I did Captain," T'Pol answered. "I believe the data we have collected from this anomaly will enable us to devise a way to avoid all other such anomalies in the future."

Archer smiled. "That's good news Sub-Commander." He turned to face the stranger on his bridge. "And what do we do about you Mr………"

"Lakanta," said Trip. "His name is Lakanta."

"At least that is the name Mr. Tucker knows," said Lakanta, shrugging.

"What would you prefer to be called?" Archer asked as he moved toward Lakanta.

"Lakanta will do," He replied.

"How did you come to be inside that anomaly Mr. Lakanta?" T'Pol asked as she went over the sensor reports from the vortex's collapse.

Lakanta smiled. "Just 'Lakanta'," he said to T'Pol. "I was simply where I needed to be."

Archer was puzzled by his answer. "What exactly do you mean by that Lakanta?"

"Only what I said Captain," answered Lakanta. He could see that the Captain did not understand. "I am a Traveler, who goes where the Universe takes me. I was simply where I needed to be, at the time I needed to be there."

Archer realized that he would just have to accept that cryptic answer. "You look human."

"But we both know I am not Captain," said Lakanta.

"What race are you then?" Archer asked.

"My people are from a place very far from here," Lakanta admitted.

"That's not the question I asked," Archer said, as he briefly looked toward T'Pol,

"But that is all the answer you are ready for Captain," Lakanta said.

"If you are from so far away, how can we help you get home?" Hoshi asked, looking up from the comm station, and turning to face Lakanta.

"Your help will not be necessary," said the gray being; and then the Traveler was gone.

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It had been nearly two days since the collapse of the sub-space static anomaly, and the disappearance of Lakanta. Life aboard Enterprise had returned to normal, or at least as normal as things got aboard the ship of late. Dr. Phlox entered the mess hall expecting to find no one else awake at this hour. Instead he found Commander Tucker sitting alone in the dimmed light. He was reading something off a PADD and frowning more heavily with each line.

Phlox got a cup of water and went over to Trip. "Still can't sleep Commander?" he asked. He had dispensed the engineer a sedative three hours earlier.

Trip looked up. "Not very well anyway," he sighed. "I still keep having the same bad dreams."

Phlox picked up the PADD that was now sitting on the table. "Reverend Ahlihalisdi Balla Ph.D., Minister and Rabboni for the All Faith Quantumist Christian Church and Sanctuary, Moab, Utah, U.S.A., Earth," he read aloud, then thought for a moment. An inhumanly large smile appeared on his face as the memory returned to him. "I attended a lecture of hers once."

Trip looked surprised. "Why?"

"I like to learn about new things Commander," replied Phlox. "It was on 'Quantumism and the IDIC'."

"The Vulcan principle of diversity?"

"Yes," said Phlox. "It was quite illuminating." He took a sip of water. "You never struck me as being very religious Commander."

Trip frowned. "I'm not," he said, reaching for the PADD. "A friend of mine from the academy sent me a few of Balla's recent sermons when he learned my sister was one among the dead. The fact is I barely glanced at them until tonight."

"You don't seem very happy with what you've read."

"You're right, I'm not," replied Trip, glancing away.

"Might I ask why?" inquired Phlox softly.

"Trip took a deep breath. "All Ahihalisdi talks about is forgiveness and 'God is still with us'."

"But…" Phlox started to say.

"But right now I'm not so sure I want to believe in a God," he shrugged and gestured absently, "or whatever." Trip clenched his fists and continued, "And I sure as hell don't want to forgive!"

"If you don't want to believe, why did you read the sermons?" Phlox inquired.

"Because of something Lakanta said."

"What did he say?"

"That we were in a place beyond the sphere of existence that I understand."

"Why is that significant?" asked the Denobulan.

Tripp picked up the PADD and scrolled down. "Because the first sermon begins, 'There are things beyond this sphere of existence that can only be found on faith, and are found by each being in their own time. Hope and forgiveness are but two of these things'." He read, then dropped the PADD with just a little disgust.

"Perhaps there is a message there for you," said Phlox, then finished his water.

"What message is that?" Tripp asked skeptically.

"That in your own time you will find hope again," said Phlox as he stood up. "And maybe then you will be ready to forgive."

Tripp thought a moment then answered, "I'll reserve judgment on that." He picked up the PADD and began to leave, but instead halted and turned to Phlox. "Do you think you could give me something a little stronger to help me sleep tonight?"

The Doctor frowned and let out a sigh. "I can, but I think you are starting to become more reliant on sedatives than you should.

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The End

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Suggested Alternate Ending:

The Doctor frowned and let out a sigh. "I can, but I think you are starting to become more reliant on sedatives than you should be Commander. Why don't you try a slice of pecan pie and a large glass of milk instead."

Trip turned and left the mess hall.

The End


End file.
